Everyday, I get up, and the first thing I do is sit down to my personal computer and put word to paper. Sometimes I remember my dreams, sometimes I speak of events from the previous day, sometimes, I just need encouragement because this world becomes too heavy on my shoulders.
I just found out recently (Friday), that my daughter is in jail. She hasn’t been home in nearly a 1/4 of a year, and it was at that time that she left me with my grand daughters, ages eleven, three, and two. Feeling completely overwhelmed, I didn’t know what to do. I am in no condition to raise anymore children. I suffer from severe osteoarthritis. And I don’t mean to disclaim that I am unable, but repeating the past 18 years just isn’t in me.
So, I sit down and express myself on monitor. I cannot imagine what goes on in my daughters mind that makes her turn from everything she's known, to search out a life without the ones she loves. My love of words is what gives me the strength to bear the pain and get through it. Hence, my something better!
Since my eldest grand daughter is living with me, I watch her go through unknowingly, a very painful situation. But each and every day something better happens, that turn my granddaughter’s frown into a smile. And should the day come when she begins to ask the hard questions, I pray that I’ll be able to answer her questions with compassion and tolerance of a situation that I have lived through and learned much love through it evermore.
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